However, sometimes, we reflect on how much we learned from cancer’s most unexpected visit, and we are thankful. I wrote the following poem in the fall of 2004 when we were doing just that. My poem is a compilation of some of Paige’s quotes. Her hair was growing back, and she was happy to finally have more hair than her two-year-old brother, Bradley! My broken heart had been repaired, and was beating with thankfulness and praise to the LORD, Jesus Christ. My children were all alive and well, outside of a few colds (which, I assured them, were not cancerous).

Journey With Cancer

My daughter was diagnosed with cancer.

She was only a child of eight.

I asked her to share some things that were bad,

And also some things that were great.

She said, “Getting shots was no fun at all!”

I had to agree with her, too.

‘Cause giving her shots was sometimes my job;

A job I did not like to do!

She talked on losing her lunch and dinner,

And the sad day she lost her hair.

But quickly said, “Mom, you know, some of my friends…

Lost their lives on earth…let’s stop there.”

She said she was thankful she has her life.

And for the gifts along the way:

“Cards, candy, games, hats, Make-A-Wish trip,

Videos, pilot for a day!”

“The love from family and friends, doctors,

Nurses, and some I’ve never met!

Learning about cancer, trusting Jesus,

And learning about life and death.”

“What is your most favorite possession?”

I asked her a few months ago.

“Jesus is my favorite possession!

Oh Momma, didn’t you know?”

~CC

"Pilot For A Day"

My children teach me things all the time. I’ll never forget the day I gave Paige the word “possession” for her spelling test, and then asked her what her favorite possession was. Her beautiful response so encouraged me, and I realized that my children have quite a bit to teach me! She was only a child of eight.

What Cancer Cannot Do

Cancer is so limited.

It cannot cripple love.

It cannot shatter hope.

It cannot corrode faith.

It cannot eat away at peace.

It cannot destroy confidence.

It cannot kill friendship.

It cannot shut out memories.

It cannot invade the soul.

It cannot reduce eternal life.

It cannot quench the spirit.

It cannot lessen the power of the resurrection.

-Anonymous

“Maw Maw” C. went to be with Jesus.

There’s nowhere else she’d rather be!

Disease made her seem child-like to us,

Although she was almost ninety!

Her mind had reverted severely.

Sadly, she was memory-free.

But we still remember her warmly-

Loving on babies, especially!

She bounced five sweet babies on her knee:

Sue, David, Jo, Beth, and Eddie.

She cared for children so happily…

Grandkids, great-grandkids…”any baby”

(She was a volunteer at “Any Baby Can”-organization that helps take care of young babies that need to be held, and she was a foster grandma)

I recall a day I wasn’t at ease,

Maw’s hands reached out to bounce my “sweet pea”.

I was torn because I felt that she

Knew her strength wasn’t like it used to be.

“Maybe I shouldn’t bounce the babies.

I’d sure hate to drop them! Oh Me!”

So, I held my child upon Maw’s knees.

We sang, smiled, bounced, and all were pleased!

Then came the day the sun went down early (she had “sundowners”)

Confused, she wanted to go home…

To love and care for her babies…

But her “babies” were now full-grown!

But Jesus remembers the day she

Got down and she prayed on her knees.

She told God that she really believes

Jesus died, paying all penalties.

A different sun, His Son, went down

To death so that we might be set free.

For all sins, but then He rose again,

For He is God, Man, Spirit…Three!

Like Maw Maw, I imagine that He

Bounced the little ones on His knee.

He said, “Let the little ones come unto Me!”

She now dwells with Him for eternity.

By CC

Thank you, Mom, for all the many ways you have loved each one of us, and you still continue to pour out your sweet love! You’re the best!

Thanks for your faithful prayers…Chris Rice-\”Mama Prays\”

Happy Mother’s Day to all of the special “other” mothers out there.

A favorite quote:

“A mother’s heart is the child’s classroom.” - Henry Ward Beecher

This reminds me of the words to a sweet song that my loving mom wrote when we were children. It’s called “Little Children”, and has always been a favorite. Here are the words:

Little Children

Little children, when I watch you as you play,

And I see your happy faces through the day.

When I hear the music of your laughter,

How the joy inside me starts to stir.

I’m reminded of my Father’s love for me—

How He loves to see me walking happily.

And my laughter comes to Him in song,

And with joy He wants to sing along.

Little children when you come to me for love,

And you throw your arms around me with a hug.

Then how very closely I must hold you

As you whisper softly, “I love you”.

I’m reminded of my Father’s love for me—

How He wants for me to crawl upon His knee,

And He wants for me to hug Him too.

And to whisper softly, “I love you”.

Little Children, when I hear you as you cry,

And I know your hurt is deep inside.

I just lift you up into my arms,

And I ask the Lord to heal your heart.

I’m reminded of my Father’s love again—

How He wipes away my tears with His hand—

How He comforts me so tenderly,

And He heals the hurt, and strengthens me.

Little children, when I tuck you in your beds,

And I kiss your five sweet sleepyheads,

And I kneel beside you as I pray,

And I thank the Lord for the day.

I’m reminded of the love of my Father—

How He prays for His sons and His daughters,

Through the night, He never even sleeps…

Even in the dark, it’s me He keeps!

~Rita Wisdom

T

Oh, how God wants us to whisper to Him that we love Him throughout our busy day. May we remember His great love, and His/our Father’s great love, and keep our hearts burning with our love for Him. May our hearts never grow cold! “We love Him, because He first loved us” (1 John 4:19).

~Mom—I’m so thankful that you are my sweet mother. Thank you for showing me God’s love through your many sacrifices and acts of kindness. You have always blessed me with wonderful birthday gifts, but having you as a mom is truly the best gift of all! Happy Birthday! I’m sending out hugs of love—oh,  and of course, a whispered “I love you!”.

The Teacher

Lord, who am I to teach the way
To little children day by day,
So prone myself to go astray?

I teach them knowledge, but I know
How faint they flicker and how low
The candles of my knowledge glow.

I teach them power to will and do,
But only now to learn anew
My own great weakness thru and thru.

I teach them love for all mankind
And all God’s creatures, but I find
My love comes lagging far behind.

Lord, if their guide I still must be,
Oh, let the little children see
The teacher leaning hard on Thee.

Leslie Pinckney Hill

So many of these songs I can sing along with, and it allows me to remember the faithfulness of God to His people. It recounts the story of the birth of Christ. It allows me to think of God and to marvel on the thought…Son of God…Son of Man. It brings to mind the kind of mind that I want to have…like the one mentioned in Philippians 2: 5-11:
“Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus:
Who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God:
But made Himself of no reputation, and took upon Him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men:
And being found in fashion as a man, He humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross.
Wherefore God also hath highly exalted Him, and given Him a name which is above every name:
That at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of things in heaven, and things in earth, and things under the earth;
And that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.”

It tells of our powerful King and our precious Lamb of God…and draws me to a place where I am beholding Him. Where do I behold Him? In the Bible, I find Him there. His CD is available to listen to (all the songs and words) for free (just no downloads available). Here is that website:
http://andrew-peterson.com/players/btlog/beholdthelamb.html

Enjoy, and Merry Christmas! One of our kids favorite songs is “Matthew’s Begats”. Here, the genealogy of Christ is  set to fun, Bluegrass music. We are tapping our toes as we rattle off all of those names in the family tree of Christ! The challenge…singing this while playing the cup game!

When it happened, I deduced from the cold water clue that someone (one of seven people in the house) did this…in the kitchen…with…an ice cube. Their crime was that they failed to pick up an ice cube…after it fell from the freezer!

I want to share a familiar poem that I like; I don’t know who wrote it, but here it is:

“HOUSE RULES
If you drop it…pick it up.
If you sleep on it…make it up.
If you wear it…hang it up.
If you spill it…wipe it up.
If you turn it on…turn it off.
If you open it…close it.
If it rings…answer it.
If it whines…feed it.
If it cries…love it.”

The particular line that came to mind was: “If you drop it, pick it up.” However, in all fairness, I should have been moving a bit more slowly. Well, then I was moving more slowly. In fact, I moved so slow, that I just finally got around to getting to the doctor on Monday!

My knee looked infected, and was so tender to the touch (Ouch! Talk about sharp pain). I thought I had removed all the glass; but, deep down in my heart, I knew there was glass—deep down in my knee. The doctor told me he would be happy to open it up and remove the glass. (That should have been my first warning…he seemed a little too “knife-happy”).

Then, he told me to lay back and “relax”, as he asked his assistant to get him the “knife”. When she brought him one, he said, “No, I ‘m going to need a bigger knife than that.” Well, about this time, my imagination was going wild. Why didn’t he just call it a scalpel or something? All I could picture was a Bowie knife. I guess I was thinking I was going to have to literally bite the bullet for pain control. So, I told the doctor he might want to tie my hands up—knowing that I would be tempted to reach down and knock the knife out of his hands.

That’s when the doctor mentioned Lidocaine, and instantly I felt better. Yippee!..numbing stuff…of course, what was I thinking? I rallied myself. After 20 minutes of treasure hunting, it was over. He had to leave a drain inside the infected wound, and now I am on antibiotic, but I am so glad that I went in. I know that I should have gone in earlier, and then my bum knee might have not bummed me out so much.

So, my point is that the little things do matter: a little ice cube, a little time passing by, a little puddle, a little rush, a little gush (from the little cuts in my knee—from little pieces of ceramic bowl), and a “little” lecture from me on the importance of little things! I am also reminded of a fitting little verse from Song of Solomon 2:15 : “Take us the foxes, the little foxes, that spoil the vines: for our vines have tender grapes.”

One more little thing…on Tuesday, I was trying to elevate my knee in the recliner, while schooling the kids. My friend over at organizing mommy has a clever name for a mom who can’t be on full duty (whether sick, injured, etc.). She has given it the title: “armchair general” (I love that). So, as I was reading to two kids, I heard a crash in the kitchen: a broken glass. Evidently, it was too close to the edge—you know, accidents happen.

Normally, I would say, “If you drop it, pick it up,” but this one was out of my comfort level. I’m not okay with having my children clean up glass. So, I got up and went about the task of cleaning up glass with a gash in my knee, and thankfully, I did not accumulate any more!

A mom is always a mom…even when she tries to be an “armchair general”. I am thankful for my arms, and my legs. I love my job here at home, and I truly am thankful that there is certainly never a dull moment around here!

Lately, like in the past few weeks, BC and I have been running…on the treadmill…like 3 miles at a time. No kidding! There is nothing pretty about us running, but we know this is good for us (at least that’s what they are telling us)! Twenty years ago, I ran 20 miles a week…no problem. Three weeks ago we tried that…uh…but we ran into a slight problem…we ran out of breath (not to mention I almost ran off the machine). So we are doing better, and we are trying to pace ourselves.

We have found it helpful to play mind games and make “deals” with the timer (run fast for a minute, slow down for a minute, increase our speed every minute for ten minutes, try to see how fast we can run a mile, etc.) One helpful tip I have learned is not to close my eyes while I run anymore…I tend to lose my footing when I do that.

Let me jog my memory a bit…I haven’t had a desire to run in over 20 years! When I was in high school, I was on the track team. I remember a time when I needed to run in my new neighborhood (Double Oak) because I was running cross-country. So, I took off running by myself one afternoon. I wasn’t aware that there wasn’t a leash law at this time, but I quickly found out that I was being followed by about two, then four, then six dogs (some not very friendly-looking). I was scared and did the most logical thing I could think of— I jumped on top of a brick mailbox, and kept on jumping (because those dogs were nipping at my heels). The only thing that was running then, were the chills up my back! Thankfully some kind, older man came running out of his house and rescued me! My hero! He reminded me of Teddy Roosevelt—He was walking softlyyelling loudly and carrying a big stick! So, thankfully the treadmill at the gym provides a dog-free atmosphere (not that I don’t like dogs).

Another memory I have of running cross-country involved directions. I was at a meet…listening to them explain where we were to run at this park, but I just assumed I would follow the crowd (mostly because I am directionally-challenged). Well, I ended up being in first place (surprise), but leading the entire group in the wrong direction (surprise again). Oops! So, the second benefit of the treadmill…I hopefully won’t get lost.

Years ago, we tried to run around our neighborhood, but we ran into two major problems:

• We live in South Texas, and it’s insanely hot.

• We developed shin splints from running on the hard pavement.

So, again…the treadmill is a great choice because we are running with better cushion for our bodies, and we are conditioning in air conditioning!

Ah…my mind is running away with running memories. One of my favorite memories of running in middle school was the Turkey Trot (I’m not sure if it was an 800 or a mile) in seventh grade. I was the fastest girl in the school, so I won a great big turkey! I remember just beaming as I rode home on the school bus with our Thanksgiving meal!

Food has always been a bigger motivator for me to run fast compared to a medal or ribbon. I still find myself wanting to run, so I can eat that gooey brownie. When I really want to run fast, I imagine I am chasing that gooey brownie…and those unfriendly dogs are chasing me!

Okay, so now you know I like food. I ran into my high school track-coach a few months ago. He asked me if I was still running. A big smile ran across my face, as I replied, “Do I look like I have been running? No way…the only running I’ve been doing is…running a household and running errands. I do play tag with the kids. Does that count?”

We have dear friends of the family who are avid runners. They are always giving us these nice marathon t-shirts. The only problem that I run into is when strangers ask me if I run marathons. Again, my response is: “Do I look like I run marathons?”. I seriously don’t look like a pro big runner…more like a pro big mama. Oh well, one step at a time, will shed some pounds…maybe. I am definitely sweating like I haven’t in years. Who knows? Maybe running will help me not to feel run down. I think I am feeling like I am in better shape, whether I look it or not.

I know exercise is important to keep our bodies running efficiently; however, balance is key! What about my Christian walk? I should be exercising myself in seeking His face everyday in prayer, and finding the beauty of Jesus in every chapter of the Bible. Jesus should be the first person I run to when I run into problems. These are great Bible verses that talk about running:

“For bodily exercise profiteth little: but godliness is profitable unto all things, having promise of the life that now is, and of that which is to come.”                                      1 Timothy 4:8

¹Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us,²Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.                                                               Hebrews 12:1-2

Know ye not that they which run in a race run all, but one receiveth the prize? So run, that ye may obtain.       1 Cor. 9:24

How sweet to hold a newborn baby,
And feel the pride and joy he gives;
But greater still the calm assurance:
This child can face uncertain days because He lives.

Chorus:
Because He lives,
I can face tomorrow.
Because He lives,
All fear is gone.
Because I know He holds the future,
And life is worth the living…
Just because He lives.

If you click on the link below, you will hear the Gaither Band sing this beautiful song on you tube. Again, I would hope to caution you about possible inappropriate pop-ups.

\”The Gaithers on YouTube\”

The Dancer

(for Paige)

Laughing, twirling gush of girl

dances with upturned face

at half-past eight.

No sign is seen – no warning noted.

She spins like ribbon unfurling,

giggles like tinkling chimes.

Without fair notice

renegades ascend the stage

to snatch, to seize, to grasp

with gasping pain.

All eyes fall on the dancer,

who sinks alone on darkest stage.

But then the Light – that single spot –

shines to document her freedom.

Great cheers erupt as she arises

at half-past ten to dance again –

Not in youth’s wild frolic,

but in grateful celebration

with deliberate joy –

still laughing, twirling gush of girl.

With love forever, Nonnie